The Home of the Brave

Memorial Day. A day to remember all those who have gone before us, especially those who have died in the service of our country. I am so greatful for those men and women who risk their lives daily for us.

My father served in the Vietnam war. He experienced things with his fellow soldiers that men are not supposed to. The human body is not designed to go through such tragic, and gruesome things. Your mind changes, it has to, to survive. Some souls don't come back from it. The lucky ones do. My dad, like countless others, watched his friends get shot and sometimes killed. He was shot in the leg, and got Maleria while in Vietnam. He received the Purple Heart. He never talked about the war. The few things I do know about it, I asked him specifically. I was always so proud that he was in the war. Any time the subject came up I always told people what he did, with great pride. Now that I think about it, I'm not sure if he knew that.

If you've experienced the loss of someone in your life, you know that you don't need a specific day to remember them though. We think about them always. Sometimes you wish you could just forget for a little while, to make it easier.

My dad didn't die in a war, but he died just the same. He died fighting a losing battle with his body. During his sickness he overcame things he shouldn't have, just like in the war, and kept going. I've never witnessed such fighting for life.

I look at life different now. I hold onto it tighter. I cry more, whether because I'm happy or sad. I try to tell people how I feel about them. I say thank you more. I try to be better.

There is a song on my blog called "Let go now Daddy". Oddly enough, this describes my life with my father almost exactly. The only difference is I was on the phone in California, not in his hospital bed telling him to let go. It is a beautiful, touching song, that makes me cry. I miss him so much.